The 2021 Flushies, Off The Grid Greenville’s Bathroom Superlative Awards
Whose throne reigns supreme?!?
Welcome to the annual tradition of Off The Grid Greenville toilet superlative awards.
To the naked eye, you might think we take this lightly, but fear not —
finding the best places to do some of our most important business is a high priority, especially after such a sh*t year.
Straight from the poop experts at Charmin, “Some of them may be real stinkers and of course, some of them are corny, but perhaps one of them will bowl you over?”
“Most Religious Experience”
Myles Pizza Pub
The pizza itself is a religious experience, but if you eat too much, you might want to beg for mercy. Next time you stop by, make sure to pay your respects and bask in this glorious light.
“Least Lonely Loo”
White Duck Taco Airport Location
No matter how lonely socially-distanced life has made you, you’ll never feel alone here with 50 faces staring back at you. No detail was lost in this modern masterpiece from the farmhouse sinks, to the continuous line contour drawings and that gorgeous color scheme, to even the ducks hidden in the wallpaper. It’s just ducky.
“Most Inclusive Potty”
Birds Fly South
At Birds Fly South, everyone is welcome. No matter what kind of animal you are… as the theme for pandemic life dictates, just wash your fricken hands. Enough said!
“Most On Brand Potty”
Swamp Rabbit Cafe
This farm stand-meets-cycling-stop on the Swamp Rabbit Trail is perfectly epitomized by the symbols in this beautiful illustration. We couldn’t dream up a more fitting wallpaper if we tried.
“Most Farm to Toilet”
Top Soil
It’s the full lifecycle experience — from Topsoil’s own farm to the table, to the . . .
Look closely and you’ll see how itty bitty the tp rolls are compared to this gorgeous wall-sized photo.
“Most Gruesome Potty”
Greenville Army Store
And once again, the honor of the most gruesome potty goes to the Greenville Army Store. While the building might be sold, do not despair. The memories of this nasty latrine will remain burnt in our memories. Forever.
With each faux autographed celebrity photo, you’ll find hygienic Petri dishes with tootsie rolls. Thanks to Steve O’Brien’s children, Molly (10) and Myles (13) who concepted this creative idea. Thanks for sharing your potty humor with us!
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